As you probably know, I've been trying to get my (parent's) health insurance company to cover breast reduction surgery for me. Evidently I am neither short nor thin enough for my bra size to be considered unusual (yes, the world is full of 5 foot tall, 105 pound women with DDs...), so the surgery is considered cosmetic unless I have enough "proof" from doctors it's medically necessary.
Recently I left a voicemail for my doctor, asking him to write a letter for the insurance company in support of my surgery. When he called back this evening while I was at dinner with Matt, I noticed the 614 area code, declaring "I don't want to talk to anyone in Ohio", and let it go to voicemail. This was lucky for the doctor, because I would've flipped the fuck out on him if I hadn't had some time to process this before speaking with him. After listening to the message, I stormed home pissed off thinking about all the things I could write on my blog to inform all my friends that... I'm pissed off.
I got on my health insurance co's website, looking for some clue as to what in the fucking hell I need to do to get what I need, as I have yet to have a doctor help me figure it out. I tried to find information to compare the cost of physical therapy and breast reduction surgery, but what I came across first stunned me. On their site, the insurance co. lists a whole bunch of things they don't cover - not a surprise. I learned for the first time though that they won't cover "Routine or periodic gynecological exams or diagnostic services related to these exams."
You have got to be shitting me. They don't cover an annual gyno exam? You cover up to $720 of Viagra pills in a year, but not a SINGLE annual gyno exam?? Nevermind screening women for cervical cancer, we better be sure men can have fucking (hehe) erections.
I mean, what do I have to do to get the health care I need out of the system I pay into? Oh that's right. Have a penis attached to my body. And I can't get one of those either because....my insurance won't cover it.
I wracked my brain trying to come up with ideas to help, and have two to offer:
ReplyDelete-Get measured with a reduced band size (next step down would have you considered FF/G)
-Steal a penis and have it surgically attached to your head like a unicorn
you're a genius. i wonder if i can get my surgeon to lie about my bra size...
ReplyDelete