Say goodbye... to these.

If you're an Arrested Development watcher (like you should be), you probably remember Kitty.  Kitty is the secretary of the Bluth company, who at one point had an affair with George Bluth - who purchased her implants after she publicly flashed her breasts for a "Girls with low self-esteem" video, and embarrasingly, was cut out of the tape.

The next Spring break, armed (chested?) with larger knockers, Kitty finds a reason to flash someone practically every time she leaves a room, shouting "Say goodbye... to these!"


I wanted to share one of these clips on my blog, as the language and excitement that Kitty expresses are appropriate to my sentiments right now - though for an opposite type of change in my breasts.  But of course, this is the only time in life that youtube has failed me in my search for an entertaining video.

Today, I haphazardly packed for my flight home to Maryland an hour before leaving for the airport.   I threw 3 or 4 bras into my duffle bag, but quickly realized.... I don't need them.   I have one more day of wearing my current bra size, and then my stash of practical bras and sexy lingerie will both become useless to me.

After picking me up at the airport, my mom asked whether I was ready/excited/nervous for my surgery on Monday.   We talked about the importance of communicating with doctors and surgeons to be sure we're on the same page, and my mom referenced a news special where she learned the advice that if you get one of your limbs removed - and it's one you have two of -that you're supposed to write in sharpie on the one you want to keep "NOT THIS ONE."   This way, if the surgeon misreads which limb s/he is supposed to remove, s/he will be reminded upon undressing you.

"So what am I supposed to write on my breasts?  'Please reduce the other one too'?" I asked her.

My mom just laughed, and agreed that I probably want them to end up somewhat symmetrical.

I briefly contemplated having a flash-a-thon (at Amanda's brilliant suggestion) the day before my surgery and shouting "Say goodbye to these!!" as Amanda escorted me into various public places.  But, as I've agreed to babysit my sisters tomorrow and take them to a neighborhood Christmas party (perhaps the least I can do as my parents shelled out nearly 6 grand for my operation), I've opted not to engage in this activity.   Though, as my parents are working on remodeling our basement and have not yet enclosed the two stripper-like poles that my 11 year old gymnast sister has realized are "fun to dance on", I think me flashing strangers would be the least of their parenting problems.

Still, I've decided that I've outgrown my flashing days, and too few people would get the reference if I ran around town asking people to "Say goodbye to these!"

Perhaps I'll just write it on my breasts Monday morning.